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VICTORIA'S SECRETS
Actress-athlete Victoria Pratt could kick your ass. And you’d probably like that, wouldn’t you, sicko? Shhh. Don’t tell her, but we’d like that, too! ;-)
Stuff, February 2002
By Bill Schulz
Considering Victoria Pratt plays a human with animal DNA in the series Mutant X, you might say this Pratt has claws. Well, you might say that, but we wouldn’t be caught dead writing such an abominable pun. Anyway, this Ontario native and fitness buff was snagged from her various workout gigs to star in the 1997 John Woo series, Once a Thief. Her able abs were further utilized for the role of Sarge in the equally sci-fi-but sadly, short-lived-series Cleopatra 2525. We recently spoke with this gym cat and found her to be as engaging as her accompanying photo spread. For another good interview, look no further than the October issue of O: The Oprah Winfrey Magazine, which features a Q&A with legendary producer Quincy Jones and the aforementioned talk-show icon. We liked it so much that we recycled one of Ope’s questions and used it on Vicky. Try to spot it! (The answer is at the bottom of the page.)
STUFF: Your hubby is director T.J. Scott. Does T.J. stand for “terribly juicy”?
VICTORIA: No, it’s Timothy James.
That said, our readers aren’t big on our girls being married. So let’s pretend you’re not. Wanna go out on a date?
It depends. What are you wearing?
Fresh! Tell me about mannish female bodybuilders you’ve encountered.
If you start putting male hormones into your body, you’re going to have changes. I remember the first professional female bodybuilding show I attended—I couldn’t believe what I saw. Many had bad boils on the skin, thicker jaws and really low voices.
Any telltale Adam’s apples? Our senior editor Mark Remy has a really unsightly one. But he’s a guy and junk.
No, no. You only see telltale Adam’s apples in West Hollywood.
That’s where Mark’s from! What about male bodybuilders? Were they all you dated when you were single?
You only need one. I’m not putting my toes into that pool again.
Your new series is titled Mutant X. Is it about malformed members of the nation of Islam?
No. It’s about mutants that have been genetically altered with various things.
Sounds familiar…
You have to talk to Marvel comics about that. I’m not allowed to talk about it, because it’s the source of a big lawsuit.
So I hear.
Yeah, we’re not allowed to make any comparisons between the two.
You also costarred in Once a Thief, directed by John Woo. Care to comment on the rumors that he’s secretly Asian?
Well, he hides it well. You’re a nut.
Since you’re Canadian, what is your advice for women dealing with the scourge that is cold-weather nipples?
Don’t go to the gym and then wear a thin shirt home. I don’t mind cold-weather nipples as long as it’s happening all at once—know what I’m saying?
Not really.
Never mind.
If you could give yourself a medal for a particular prowess in bed, what would it be and why?
You know what? My mother’s going to read this on the Internet.
Uh, we only show the pictures on the Web site. You think I want my mom reading this? I don’t want her thinking I’m some kind of letch. Trust me.
Yeah, “Trust me.” What’s my specialty? I’m very flexible, and I don’t have sharp teeth—if you know what I mean.
Since your character has animal DNA, would you say that her sexual fashion sense is strictly doggie-style?
You are a horrible man. Yeah, yeah. There’s a lot of that going on in my dressing room. Too bad I’m usually alone.
If you were forced to make love to another animal-you know, to save someone from a bad guy-what kind of animal would it be?
You’re horrible! I’d have to see who has the most to offer. I mean, I might as well make it worth my while. I wouldn’t invite Stuff to photograph it, I can tell you that.
A recent article I read reported that the most calorie-burning sexual act one can do is, well, anal. Is this an exercise you’ve ever done? [Note to research: Don’t bother trying to find this “article.”]
Ugh. No! I don’t think I’ll ever have to work out that hard. I imagine it happens in prison a lot-that’s probably where they got that statistic.
Do you feel you’re often perceived as a man who dates only white women?
Huh? What do you mean? You’ll have to redefine the question.
Er, as a bodybuilder, are you perceived as a woman who dates women?
I think if you’re strong, people think you’re into women. I’ve had women hit on me. I’m like, “You’re cute, but I’ve never been to Brazil.” We call women’s privates Brazil in the makeup trailer.
I call that body part Hairysburg, Penisylvania. To each his own, I guess.
-Answer Key-
And the Oprah Winfrey/Quincy Jones interview question is:
“Do you feel you’re often perceived as a man who dates only white women?”
- Issue 27
